Dates of the Alphabet
by GryffindorPrincess0894
Summary: Sirius dares James to ask Lily out using words of his choice. Well that should end well... Drabbles from A-Z through Lily and James' relationship. COMPLETE!
1. Prologue

**Summary: Sirius dares James to ask Lily out using words of his choice. Well that should end well... **

**Characters: James, Sirius.**

* * *

Prologue

Sirius: "Okay Prongs, truth or dare?"

James: "Dare!"

Sirius: "Okay... I dare you to ask out Lily Evans, but you must include a word that I choose for every letter of the alphabet."

James: "What? No!"

Sirius: "Why not? You've asked her out hundreds of times before"

James: "Yeah but I know what types of words you'll choose."

Sirius: "Fine then. I'll just have to tell Lily who 'accidentally' sat on her pygmy puff..."

James: "I'll do it!"

Sirius: "Yay!"

James: "I'm so going to regret this..."

* * *

**Reviews greatly appreciated :)**


	2. A – Acquisition

**Characters: James, Lily.**

* * *

A – Acquisition

James: "Lily! Hey Lily!"

Lily: "What do you want Potter?"

James: "Uh, you know... you have acquisitioned my heart! Will you go out with me?"

Lily: "Just because you use bigger words doesn't mean I'm going to accept"

James: "So that would be a no, right?"

Lily: "Aren't you a bright one?"

* * *

**Go on... click the button... you know you want to...**


	3. B – Bacteria

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

B – Bacteria

James: "Evans you're like bacteria to me!"

Lily: "WHAT?!"

James: "Uh I mean that you, um, you get into the cracks... of my, um, heart?"

Lily: "POTTER!"

James: "Wh-when I'm with you I feel you spreading through my very soul"

Lily: "That's disgusting"

* * *

**Reviews keep my world spinning :D**


	4. C – Crimson

**Characters: James, Lily, Sirius**

* * *

C – Crimson

Lily: "Potter, why are you standing on the table in the middle of the Great Hall?"

James: "Oh Evans let me count the ways I love you!"

Lily: "Oh God..."

James: "I love the beautiful crimson colour you turn when you're angry or embarrassed..."

Sirius: "Like right now?"

* * *

**All who review get a cookie and a hug! **


	5. D – Detergent

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

D – Detergent

James: "Evans on our fist date I would take you to get detergent!"

Lily: "Potter, are you saying that I smell?!"

James: "N-no Lily I meant that I don't care where we go as long as I'm with you"

Lily: "Aw... no. You still implied that I smell."

* * *

**Ah what would I do without reviews?**


	6. E – Elephant

****

Characters: James, Lily, Sirius

* * *

E – Elephant

James: "Lily would you go out with me if I said that you reminded me of an elephant?"

Lily: "Are you implying that I'm fat?!"

James: "NO! I meant like, majestic..."

Lily: "Sure..."

James: "Yeah! And I think I'm like an elephant too! Actually I would say I'm more like a stag; bold, cunning, proud, handsome, fast- hey Lily where'd you go?"

* * *

**Reviews, reviews.. what would the world be without reviews?**


	7. F – Flirt

**Characters: James, Lily, Sirius**

* * *

F – Flirt

Lily: "You horrid, stupid, foul lump of a boy. I hate you with everything I am!"

James: "Lily... are you flirting with me?"

Lily: "..."

James: "OW!"

Sirius: "Judging by the bright red mark on you face I'm guessing that's a no..."

* * *

**Do words even need to be spoken anymore? :)**


	8. G – Global Warming

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

G – Global Warming

James: "Lily, I think I've figured out the reason for global warming..."

Lily: "Really? What is it?"

James: "It's because you're so hot"

Lily: "Excuse me? Are you telling me I'm the reason for a world-wide catastrophe?!"

James: "... oh come on! That was one of my best lines!"

Lily: "That is so sad, you know I almost feel sorry for you..."

James: "Really?"

Lily: "Almost. But pretty soon I'll remember all the reasons I would like to push you off a cliff"

James: "Lily, be reasonable. You're not strong enough to push me off a cliff, you're a girl"

Lily: "And it all comes flooding back to me..."

* * *

**Hey! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in ages but I assure you, I haven't died. But I have been extremely busy.  
I'm on school holidays at the moment so I'll be attempting to update more often!  
****Anyway, I've made a double post so enjoy. And remember the more reviews, the quicker I post another letter :)**


	9. H – Hurt

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

H – Hurt

James: "Did it hurt?"

Lily: "Did what hurt?"

James: "When you fell from heaven, 'cos damn you look like an angel"

Lily: "Potter, just give up on the lines"

James: "Nah, you're just scared 'cos they're working so well"

Lily: "Potter, did it hurt?"

James: "Did what hurt?"

Lily: "When you were dropped on your head as a child. Repeatedly."

* * *

**Ah reviews... gotta love 'em**


	10. I – Idiot

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

I – Idiot

James: "Lily, I don't think you're an idiot!"

Lily: "Yeah well I don't think you're an idiot either!"

James: "..."

Lily: "No wait! I mean I DO think you're an idiot! Argh!"

James: "Wait, did you just screw up? HAHA SUCK! For once it wasn't me! In your face!"

Lily: "..."

James: "Wait, Lily come back. I didn't mean it!"

* * *

**Yeah, sorry I haven't updated in a while but to make up for it I have given you five new letters!  
And I think I should stop telling people I'm going to update sooner because I won't, but after a little while I come out with lots of chapters, so be happy with that :D**

**As usual, I love reviews.. blah blah blah... :)**


	11. J – Juggle

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

J – Juggle

James: "You know Lily, you can juggle pretty good. You should ask Dumbledore if you can do it at the end of term feast"

Lily: "First of all, I can't do that! I have the self confidence of a peanut! And second of all, no."

James: "You know I imagine a peanut would have pretty high self confidence..."

Lily: "..."

James: "No, no seriously! Think about it, a peanut is fat and ugly and yet it gets up every morning waiting to be eaten anyway"

Lily: "Your logic scares me and I'm afraid for your sanity..."

James: "That's what Moony always tells me..."

* * *

**Reviews? ...please?**


	12. K – Kill

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

K – Kill

James: "Lily, I would kill to be with you!"

Lily: "Who exactly would you kill?"

James: "Everyone! Well except maybe Sirius, Remus and Peter. And my parents, I love them. And Remus' parents... they're really nice, you know! His mum bakes the most delicious cookies and- Lily? Lily wait! Why are you always walking away from me? Well I'd definitely kill Snivellus for you!"

* * *

**Why are you still looking down here? REVIEW! :D**


	13. L – Love

**Characters: James, Lily, Remus**

* * *

L– Love

James: "Lily, I love you..."

Lily: "What?"

James: "I said, I love you"

Lily: "..."

James: "Lily, you alright? You look like you're about to pass out"

Lily: "You've never actually said that to me before"

James: "I know. So what do you think?"

Lily: "I-I can't Jam-Potter. I just can't..."

James: "Aw Lily don't run away! Damn it Moony! Padfoot let you choose one letter and you waste it on a sappy word like love, telling me I should just tell her how I feel. Well it didn't work!"

Remus: "Prongs... she nearly called you James"

James: "...PADS! Let Moony choose another letter!"

* * *

**Ah you gotta love Remmy  
****And yeah, I had to have a sappy one in here...  
****  
Now, how much do I love reviews?**


	14. M – Mature

**Characters: James, Sirius, Lily, Snivellus- I mean Snape :)**

* * *

M – Mature

James: "C'mon Lily, give me a chance! I'm more mature now!"

Sirius: *Nods head in agreement*

Lily: "Well I don't know..."

Snape: "Why don't you two just leave her alone?"

James: "Shut up Snivellus, before I hex you so much your grandkids will feel it!"

Sirius: "Prongs be reasonable, who in their right minds would ever marry a slime ball like that, let alone have his kids?"

James: "True, true. So yeah, as I was saying, I'm more mature now- why are you looking at me like that?"

* * *

**Snape lovers do not have to review, I do not understand them...  
And no, I'm not insulting anyone. Just simply giving my opinion.. COUGHSNAPESUCKSCOUGH!  
Hmm, sorry. Got something caught in my throat :) **

**But to everyone else, reviews would just make my day...**


	15. N – Naughty

**I'd like to point out to all those who read M before I got a chance to change it that it was, in fact Sirius that called Snape a slime ball. I just screwed up :)**

Characters: James, Lily

* * *

N – Naughty

Lily: "Potter, your shirt is unbuttoned"

James: "I know. I've been a naughty boy Lily, punish me..."

Lily: "...okay"

James: "OW! I didn't mean you needed to give me boils! I meant punish me sexually..."

Lily: "..."

James: "OW! Lily stop hexing me! Noooo I need those!"

* * *

**Anyone wanna venture a guess as to what it is he needs? ;)  
Wow, this one was pretty suggestive..**

**I'd like to acknowledge the lovely reviewers that have helped get this story out:**

**SeekerGirl** - The very first, thanks dude :)  
**cr3zygurl07  
Blue-Eyed Chica** - You review very loyally, thankyou :)  
**EOSVU4eva** - A lot of your reviews make me laugh and you've always reviewed, I love you :)  
**ajteel0203  
MsDateman  
sarah  
Romance and Musicals  
Little Miss Mischief  
black16lily** - You review after every post, you rock man! :)  
**LILYandJAMESareCUTE  
Piscesfairy  
Jed52  
WhensunshinewiltsIdanceinrainc** - You review all the time as well, I humbly thank you :)  
**firehottie  
Sirius Obsessed  
Spongyllama  
LiveLaughLoveSwim  
purplefeather21  
Stardawn  
RhiannonAmidala  
emo-marauder-d-93  
EMMETRULEs247  
piegirl10164  
shygirl135  
Annieisjaws  
Reader-Writer** - The third paragraph thingy in your profile made me laugh :D  
**Riiko Shea  
Lioness-of-Tortall-7** - Dude, I love you HAHA  
**cookiedoughYUM**

**If I have missed someone who has reviewed or forgot to thank them for reviewing after every post, let me know!  
All of you deserve a big HUG! So go and hug whoever is closest and pretend its me :D  
ALL OF YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME!! **


	16. O – Origami

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

O – Origami

James: "I made you an origami lily, Lily"

Lily: "Really?"

James: "Well, no. But I would if I knew how to make one"

Lily: "You know Severus made me an origami snake..."

James: "... Padfoot! Moony! New plan! Do either of you know how to make an origami lion? Preferably one that eats stupid little origami snakes?"

* * *

**Review? :)**


	17. P – Poem

**I** **hauled Sirius into this chapter with threats of dementors from Lioness-of-Tortall-7. Also becuase she scares me a bit... nah I'm joking.  
But I still threatened Sirius :D**

**Characters: Sirius, James, Lily**

* * *

P – Poem

Sirius: "Why do I need to be here again?"

James: "Because you wrote it and so if she doesn't like it, I can blame it on you"

Sirius: "Great..."

James: "Shut up, here she comes! Lily! I wrote you a poem!"

Lily: "Oh God, kill me now"

James: "Roses are red!"

Lily: *snort*

James: "Violets are blue!"

Lily: "Black, why are you always here when Potter decides to try poetry?"

Sirius: "Moral support"

Lily: "Uh-huh, sure"

James: "Your as pretty as a lily and you'd be good in fe-te-med?"

Sirius: "Bed"

James: "And you'd be good in bed too!"

Lily: "..."

James: "I blame it on Sirius!"

Lily: "..."

James: "Lily don't walk away from me again! Please? Dammit Padfoot! I told you to write the last line like I would write it, not you!... and your handwriting sucks"

* * *

**I kinda got carried away when I wrote this one and added another bit with James and Sirius bickering, fake threats and some gay jokes ;)  
It is actually a bit similar to a conversation I had with one of my friends...  
If you would like me to add the extended version then let me know**


	18. P – Poem: Extended Version

**Okay so here is the extended version, enjoy :)**

**Characters: Sirius, James, Lily, Random fangirl**

* * *

P – Poem

Sirius: "Why do I need to be here again?"

James: "Because you wrote it and so if she doesn't like it, I can blame it on you"

Sirius: "Great..."

James: "Shut up, here she comes! Lily! I wrote you a poem!"

Lily: "Oh God, kill me now"

James: "Roses are red!"

Lily: *snort*

James: "Violets are blue!"

Lily: "Black, why are you always here when Potter decides to try poetry?"

Sirius: "Moral support"

Lily: "Uh-huh, sure"

James: "Your as pretty as a lily and you'd be good in fe-te-med?"

Sirius: "Bed"

James: "And you'd be good in bed too!"

Lily: "..."

James: "I blame it on Sirius!"

Lily: "..."

James: "Lily don't walk away from me again! Please? Dammit Padfoot! I told you to write the last line like I would write it, not you!... and your handwriting sucks"

Sirius: "Well the only thing I could think of writing would have been 'and your name is one too' but it was so lame, my hand didn't want to co-operate. And my handwriting is perfectly fine, it's not my fault your blind"

James: "...bitch"

Sirius: "Whore"

James: "Slut"

Sirius: "Fag"

James: "Moony lover"

Sirius: "What?"

James: "I saw you making out with Remus last night! Don't deny it!"

Random fan girl: "WHAT?! Sirius isn't gay! He can't be! Nooo!"

Sirius: "I hate you"

James: "It was just a joke, jeez. I didn't think she'd flip out. Er Sirius?"

Sirius: "Yeah?"

James: "Is she heading in the direction of the library?"

Sirius: "...Oh crap! Prongs, when I'm done saving Moony I'm going to kill you!"

James: *gulp*

* * *

**Well that was extremely long and pointless!  
But let me know what you think anyway :)**

**Oh and to answer your question EOSVU4eva yes I come up with all these lines myself, well except for the ones about angels and global warming but those are classic. How could I not use them? :D**


	19. Q – Quidditch

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

Q – Quidditch

James: "Hey Lily, wanna come watch me play in the Quidditch match this Friday?"

Lily: "No."

James: "Aw, c'mon. I hear I look very sexy on a broom..."

Lily: "Potter, I have better things to do then watch you flying around on a broomstick throwing a ball around with everybody swooning at you"

James: "Like what?"

Lily: "Like watching paint dry."

* * *

**Well I only just realised that I was up to the letter Q and I hadn't even made a Quidditch reference yet.. it was shameful.. so here it is :D  
Now for those of you who wanted Sirius and Remus back, don't worry they're coming.**

Oh and one more thing, for those of you that have taken the poll on my profile, thankyou very much. For those of you who haven't.. =O go take it now! 

**:) review!**


	20. R – Ride

****

Characters: James, Lily, Sirius, Remus

* * *

R – Ride

James: "Lily, guess what I have!"

Lily: "..."

James: "The keys to Sirius' motorbike. Wanna go for a... ride?"

Lily: "Stop waggling your eyebrows like that, it's creepy"

James: "I think it's sexy"

Lily: "You scare me. Anyway, Black just let you take his keys?

James: "Yeah, he lent them to me. Why?"

Lily: "It's just because, I remember the time he nearly ran me over with it and then spent the rest of the night yelling at me for chipping the paint"

James: "Yeah, but I-"

Sirius: "JAMES POTTER! YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD! COME BACK HERE WITH THOSE KEYS! I KNOW YOU STOLE THEM! I'LL KILL YOU!"

James: "Er, I gotta go Lily. Lovely to see you again, I'll miss you! Oh, and by the way, I would like lilies at my funeral. Thanks very much. See you in the next life! Bye!"

Lily: "...did he just kiss me?"

Remus: "On the cheek, yes. You gonna yell at him again?"

Lily: "No, I think Black will do enough damage to him for the both of us"

Sirius: "STOP IT! COME BACK HERE!"

James: "ARGHHHHHHH-" *runs into a tree*

Sirius: "HAHA I'VE GOT YOU NOW! DIE DIE DIE!"

Remus: "More like enough damage for the entire Slytherin Quidditch team..."

* * *

**Ah, the three of them together is hell, especially James and Sirius :)  
For now, the bike does not fly. But its still awesome!  
Wow, I'm so proud of myself.. I came up with this at 11:49pm, go me!**

**You see the button down there? The one that says review and then go? Yeah? Well click it :)  
**


	21. S – Stripper

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

S – Stripper

James: "You know, I think you would make a very sexy stripper..."

Lily: "...no, I will not go out with you and no, I will not give you a lap dance either"

James: "...damn!"

* * *

**Well, you can't blame a bloke for trying.. :)**

Do I even have to remind you to review?


	22. T – Troll

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

T – Troll

James: "Lily-flower, have you ever gotten a Troll for Transfiguration?"

Lily: "No."

James: "Huh..."

Lily: "Why?"

James: "It's just that you seem to be having some trouble with it and I was wondering if you would consider me as a private tutor, I mean I _am_ the top of the class after all..."

Lily: "Potter... did you just manage to not only insult my intelligence but also inflate your ego in one sentence?"

James: "Erm... yes?"

Lily: "..."

James: "No."

Lily: "..."

James: "Maybe."

Lily: "..."

James: "You have really pretty hair?"

Lily: -facepalm-

* * *

**-Runs and hides from angry readers- I'm sorry I haven't updated in ages but I had sirius (really bad joke..) writers block. And I know this chapter isn't exacty up to scratch but I updated! So.. does that make up for it? Please?  
Ah I know you all love me so it's okay :D**

**More chapters coming soon!**


	23. U – Unconscious

**Characters: James, Lily, Sirius, Remus**

* * *

U – Unconscious

James: "Lily, my love will knock you unconscious!"

Lily: "Potter if you don't go away you'll soon find out that you can be knocked unconscious as well."

James: "Lils, nobody is strong enough to knock me unconscious."

Lily: "..."

Sirius: "What the hell Evans?"

Lily: "I warned him."

Sirius: "Ah great, now I'm going to have to drag him all the way back to the dorm.."

Lily: "Okay, bye. And make sure he hits his head on many hard objects!"

Remus: "You going to tell him there's a simple charm to levitate Prongs back?"

Lily: "Nope."

Remus: "Didn't think so..."

* * *

**Lily and Remus are a bit mean.. but gosh, James really needs to deflate that ego :)**

**Look guys you've come this far and read all my desperate pleas for reviews so I think I should stop now... you guys all know what makes me happy!**


	24. V – Valentine

**Characters: James, Lily, Remus**

* * *

V – Valentine

James: "Lily, I love you very much.. I'd give my life for you if I had the chance. Will you be my Valentine?"

Lily: "James... I can't, I'm sorry."

James: "But why not?"

Lily: "I-..."

James: "Moony! She said my full first name this time!"

Remus: "Finally. I was beginning to wonder if she even knew what it was..."

James: "You definitely need to pick another letter."

Remus: "Erm, I can't."

James: "Why not?

Remus: "Well Sirius threatened to take away my chocolate the next time I 'intervene'. And I'm sorry but chocolate is more important right now."

James: "Revenge will be soon be mine... just you wait Sirius Black... just you wait!"

Remus: "Why are you talking to the sky?"

* * *

**:)**


	25. W – Whore

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

W – Whore

James: "Oh Lily, will you be my whore for the night?"

Lily: "Yes, of course. Anything! I want you..."

James: "Seriously?!"

Lily: "No."

* * *

**:D**


	26. X – Xylophone

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

X – Xylophone

James: "I bought you a xylophone Lily!"

Lily: "Any why on Earth would I want a xylophone?"

James: "Don't you play it?"

Lily: "No. I play the violin."

James: "Damn it. PADFOOT!"

* * *

**Put your hand up if you think the Marauders are awesome! :D**


	27. Y – You

**Characters: James, Lily**

* * *

Y – You

James: "Lily! You're the Ying to my Yang, you're my other half, you are my very soul..."

Lily: "Wow Potter, that's deep... How'd you manage to bribe Remus?"

James: "With a hell of a lot of chocolate."

* * *

**Gotta love Moony and his chocolate..**


	28. Z – Zucchini

**Characters: James, Lily, Sirius, Remus**

* * *

Z – Zucchini

James: "Lily... YOU LOOK LIKE A ZUCCHINI!"

Lily: "... yes."

James: "What?"

Lily: "Yes."

James: "Yes you look like a zucchini?"

Lily: "Yes I will go out with you, you dork."

James: "..."

Sirius: "Lily! What have you done to him?!"

Lily: "I said yes."

Sirius: "..."

Remus: "So I take it you said yes?"

Lily: "Yep. They fainted, you were right."

Remus: "Naturally."

* * *

**Poor James finally gave up only to get quite a shock... a good shock though :)**

**Zomg, that was my last letter people. Thank you to all those who reviewed, I'll be posting a full list in the epliogue.  
Love you all!**


	29. Epilogue

**Characters: James, Sirius**

**

* * *

**

Epilogue

James: "And so the dare is complete..."

Sirius: "Yeah, and you got the girl in the end."

James: "That's a definite bonus. I still can't believe she said yes..."

Sirius: "Me neither. Well it's a good thing we didn't overreact when she did."

James: "Yeah, that would have been embarrassing..."

Sirius: "But we didn't so it's all good."

James: "Okay Pads, truth or dare?"

Sirius: "Dare."

James: "I dare you... to attempt to get detention using a word of my choice for every letter of the alphabet."

Sirius: -gulp-

**

* * *

**

**Mwhahahah, REVENGE! :D  
Tell me what you think, should I do a story for Sirius' dare? (If so, I'm definitely gonna need help with a title x])**

**Also, I sincerely thank all the reviewers, especially those who have reviewed for every chapter and those who stayed with me from the very begninning: **

**SeekerGirl  
cr3zygurl07  
Blue-Eyed Chica  
EOSVU4eva  
ajteel0203  
MsDateman  
sarah  
Romance and Musicals  
Little Miss Mischief  
black16lily  
LILYandJAMESareCUTE  
Piscesfairy  
Jed52  
WhensunshinewiltsIdanceinrainc  
firehottie  
Sirius Obsessed  
Spongyllama  
LiveLaughLoveSwim  
purplefeather21  
Stardawn  
RhiannonAmidala  
emo-marauder-d-93  
EMMETRULEs247  
piegirl10164  
shygirl135  
Annieisjaws  
Reader-Writer  
Riiko Shea  
Lioness-of-Tortall-7  
cookiedoughYUM  
xMrsJamesPotterx  
Gandalf the Grey-Edelwiess  
I am Animal  
AlannaDragon  
Emma  
Entchanted  
lostmidtranslation  
HappilyBlue  
Aly-Cat101  
ElementUchihaMaster  
lilyre  
redheads-have-more-fun-HPLVR  
Annieisjaws  
Abarraine  
Rhy-wen  
Ski-up-and-go**

**All of you guys are awesome! :D**


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